Ripley in Review
While perusing the papers this week, I came across some bits and pieces in the October 26, 1939 issue of the Ripley Review you might find interesting. I’m amused by the style of writing back then. This is all in good humor, with no intent to antagonize, criticize or in any other manner upset any of my readers.
Gambling House Raided
Andy Arkielpane, Jamestown, was arrested Thursday afternoon on a charge of operating a gambling house. Arkielpane was the only man in the place at the time the police raided it. The place had been chartered by the state as the Chadakoin club.
(Bad timing on the part of the police – they couldn’t raid during, say, the evening when there may have been some customers?)
Aged Woman Fractures Hip
Mrs. Florrie Benedict, aged 79 years, received a fractured left hip when a heavy truck tire and rim fell on her while she was in the garage in the rear of her home Monday afternoon.
(Couldn’t she have refused receipt?)
Pulling Up Street Car Rails
A specially designed machine has been in use in removing street car rails from Central Avenue in Fredonia, and a company is to be formed to promote the use of the machine which is now operated by man power. Four men are required to operate the machine and they can take up 400 to 480 feet of rails a day.
(Good luck with promoting that! Can you imagine getting someone to do that today? Sounds like hard work.)
Farm Buildings Destroyed
The large barn and three farm buildings on the Clayton Kelly farm in North Clymer were destroyed by fire last Thursday night during the electrical storm which swept over the section last week Thursday night.
(Wait, when was that? Last Thursday?)
Silver Fox Sighted
A large silver fox made its appearance on the Frank Thayer farm which is located on the Frewsburg-Kennedy road. The animal sauntered across the road, proceeded in a leisurely manner across the yard and disappeared into the woods back of the house.
(Now there’s a nice use of descriptive words. Cocky little devil…)
Yessir, Another Bigger Yam
That this has been an exceptionally good year for the raising of sweet potatoes, or more properly, yams, was proven again Monday when Ross Wolf brought to The Review office one of the big tubers he raised right here in Ripley. The tuber weighed 4 ¾ pounds when dug.
(So what did the yam weight after it was dug?)
And my personal favorite:
County to Get Prisoner
When John J. Burke is released from Albany county jail after serving his sentence, he will be met by John J. Warren of Dunkirk with a warrant for his arrest on a charge of second degree larceny. The man is alleged to have rifled a poor box at Holy Trinity church in Dunkirk, the amount obtained having been about $95. According to Police Chief Warren, Burke has served about 25 years of his life in jail and that he is on record as having confessed to about 15,000 burglaries involving 7000 churches.
(Does this mean God doesn’t help those who help themselves?)